Sunday, December 31, 2006
Devoid
I went searching for a knife, but the kitchen was devoid of anything sharper than a spoon.
Lately, it seems like my mind has been completely blank.. and my emotions are all mixed-up.. though one thing is for sure.. I am so fucking worried about Carla~! She's been crying for nights.. and now she is completely numb.. hay.. I really wish that.. she'll be happy..
So yeah.. for some reason.. prang.. I no longer feel anything.. though yeah.. yung mga "things" that were suppose to be "little problems".. which I treat as "big problems".. are still at meh.. and I still can't completely forget about it.. it's kinda like urging me to kill myself.. para.. I would no longer think and feel.. hahaha.. and everyone would be happy.. oh joy..
I usually feel like.. all I want to do is cry.. but then.. yeah.. nagsasawa na ako.. hay..~!
Sooo.. yeah.. for a change.. so you see.. when I was in grade six I used to study at JRCA, and yeah.. I had classmates which are twins, Bobby Pagotan and Robert Pagotan, they had a sister Charyze Pagotan, who is now known as Chariz Solomon of Starstruck batch 4. I don't really watch it, I just got the news from Aya.. XD
So yeah.. I searched the internet for information about the batch 4, and then I found ubershocking news~! (Since I don't really watch.. XD)
"If she won’t be part of the StarStruck 4 Final 14, she’s bound for Japan and her Babe of the Month pictures will be published by FHM at last.
Sabi ni Chariz Solomon, isa sa StarStruck 4 The Next Level Top 20, tapos na ang pictorial niya para sa FHM magazine na ilalabas sana sa January 2007.
“Hindi ko kasi akalaing makapapasa ako rito’t papalaring mapabilang sa Top 20. Pinatigil ko ang pagpapalabas ng sexy pictorial sa FHM at naintindihan naman nila,” ani Chariz sa ginanap na press launch kamakailan.
“Hindi ko rin ikinakailang nagsasayaw ako sa iba’t ibang bar dahil ako ang tumatayong breadwinner ng aming pamilya. Ang tatay ko ay nag-asawa ng iba at iniwan kaming mag-iina.
“Ang mama ko naman, nagpunta ng Japan at may asawa na rin doon. Apat kaming magkakapatid, ako ang panganay.
“Totoo ring naging alaga ako ni Jojo Veloso, pero naging busy si Tito Jojo at napabayaan ako, kaya umalis na ako sa kanya. Alam ko ring pagiging bold star ang papasukin ko nang magpa-manage ako kay Tito Jojo,” patuloy pa ni Chariz.
Inamin din ng seksing 17-year-old na nawala ang pagka-dalaga niya sa edad na 15, pero wala naman daw siyang pinagsisihan. May boyfriend siya ngayon na mas matanda sa kanya. [source]
Chariz is also known as Charyze Pagotan." http://www.halukay.com/tv/starstruck/2006/12/30/chariz-solomon-fhm-japayuki-to-be/
So yeah.. it's just.. kinda sad that people thinks that way towards her.. well.. I really haven't known her in person, or made friends with her, but I do think she's a nice person, since no one ever hated her at school.. well.. ewan.. everyone can change.. XD
----- Edit ----- 5:50 pm
Yes.. I feel oh so wrong today.. I don't feel like talking to him.. I'm not mad or anything like that.. it's just that.. I feel sad whenever I hear his voice.. and yeah.. there's something inside me that's telling me.. to stop talking to him.. even for a day.. just once.. I would like to forget about him muna.. maybe.. I'm not hapoo lng.. kya.. I don't wanna talk to him.. prolly..
But yeah.. I had remembered a dream again.. though yeah.. it's not that clear anymore.. but I know.. it was a good one.. but I hate it for some reason.. gahh.. I no longer know what to do.. I just feel so wrong.. I would like to talk this out to someone.. but I know that that someone.. is at Cebu.. it was really sad.. that I only got to talk to him for a couple of minutes.. I just need some help.. I guess..
I won't be enjoying New Year again..
RULES
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ORE WA ONNA JANAI
Watashi wa Althea desu. A normal otaku.
I'm happy to have friends which will last forever, and I'm hoping for a longer relationship with my Anata.
Hope this upcoming new life will be a lot more wonderful than my past few years. Hoorah for college!
Let's create more memories together. Zutto zutto.
P.S WATASHI WA ONNA DESU! ^^
I CRAVE FOR
i'll write it down in the death note;
Digital Camera
Death Note Live Action
Summer Tour 2007 Final Time: Kotoba no Chikara DVD
To set foot in Japan with my TOMODACHI
Death Note
Hapoo Memories
Finish College
NIPPON ARTIST
TOMODACHI
Anno Meg
Little Meggy
XD Ryan
Arekixu Leks
Jethro
Jenny-chan
Miggs
Jizelle
Queens
Suicidal Imo
Kimmeh
EXITS
KILL THE SILENCE
KINOU
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