Love Situation _________________________________________________

Sunday, December 31, 2006

Devoid
I went searching for a knife, but the kitchen was devoid of anything sharper than a spoon.

Lately, it seems like my mind has been completely blank.. and my emotions are all mixed-up.. though one thing is for sure.. I am so fucking worried about Carla~! She's been crying for nights.. and now she is completely numb.. hay.. I really wish that.. she'll be happy..

So yeah.. for some reason.. prang.. I no longer feel anything.. though yeah.. yung mga "things" that were suppose to be "little problems".. which I treat as "big problems".. are still at meh.. and I still can't completely forget about it.. it's kinda like urging me to kill myself.. para.. I would no longer think and feel.. hahaha.. and everyone would be happy.. oh joy..

I usually feel like.. all I want to do is cry.. but then.. yeah.. nagsasawa na ako.. hay..~!

Sooo.. yeah.. for a change.. so you see.. when I was in grade six I used to study at JRCA, and yeah.. I had classmates which are twins, Bobby Pagotan and Robert Pagotan, they had a sister Charyze Pagotan, who is now known as Chariz Solomon of Starstruck batch 4. I don't really watch it, I just got the news from Aya.. XD

So yeah.. I searched the internet for information about the batch 4, and then I found ubershocking news~! (Since I don't really watch.. XD)

"If she won’t be part of the StarStruck 4 Final 14, she’s bound for Japan and her Babe of the Month pictures will be published by FHM at last.

Sabi ni Chariz Solomon, isa sa StarStruck 4 The Next Level Top 20, tapos na ang pictorial niya para sa FHM magazine na ilalabas sana sa January 2007.

“Hindi ko kasi akalaing makapapasa ako rito’t papalaring mapabilang sa Top 20. Pinatigil ko ang pagpapalabas ng sexy pictorial sa FHM at naintindihan naman nila,” ani Chariz sa ginanap na press launch kamakailan.

“Hindi ko rin ikinakailang nagsasayaw ako sa iba’t ibang bar dahil ako ang tumatayong breadwinner ng aming pamilya. Ang tatay ko ay nag-asawa ng iba at iniwan kaming mag-iina.

“Ang mama ko naman, nagpunta ng Japan at may asawa na rin doon. Apat kaming magkakapatid, ako ang panganay.

“Totoo ring naging alaga ako ni Jojo Veloso, pero naging busy si Tito Jojo at napabayaan ako, kaya umalis na ako sa kanya. Alam ko ring pagiging bold star ang papasukin ko nang magpa-manage ako kay Tito Jojo,” patuloy pa ni Chariz.

Inamin din ng seksing 17-year-old na nawala ang pagka-dalaga niya sa edad na 15, pero wala naman daw siyang pinagsisihan. May boyfriend siya ngayon na mas matanda sa kanya. [source]

Chariz is also known as Charyze Pagotan." http://www.halukay.com/tv/starstruck/2006/12/30/chariz-solomon-fhm-japayuki-to-be/

So yeah.. it's just.. kinda sad that people thinks that way towards her.. well.. I really haven't known her in person, or made friends with her, but I do think she's a nice person, since no one ever hated her at school.. well.. ewan.. everyone can change.. XD

----- Edit ----- 5:50 pm

Yes.. I feel oh so wrong today.. I don't feel like talking to him.. I'm not mad or anything like that.. it's just that.. I feel sad whenever I hear his voice.. and yeah.. there's something inside me that's telling me.. to stop talking to him.. even for a day.. just once.. I would like to forget about him muna.. maybe.. I'm not hapoo lng.. kya.. I don't wanna talk to him.. prolly..

But yeah.. I had remembered a dream again.. though yeah.. it's not that clear anymore.. but I know.. it was a good one.. but I hate it for some reason.. gahh.. I no longer know what to do.. I just feel so wrong.. I would like to talk this out to someone.. but I know that that someone.. is at Cebu.. it was really sad.. that I only got to talk to him for a couple of minutes.. I just need some help.. I guess..

I won't be enjoying New Year again..

LOVE & JOY

Thursday, December 28, 2006

LIE

He went over.. to pay a visit nung.. December 26.. it was really unexpected.. since that.. he never told me he'll drop by to cause snafu again.. but then.. yeah.. I was sooo happy I saw that adorable face of his.. I was really.. hahaha.. XD nvm.. XD so yeah.. halos araw-araw na akong pinapagalitan ni mommy.. and yes.. I'm getting used to it.. she still wouldn't stop the issue about him calling Meg when he reached home after giving the present.. well yeah.. that thing wouldn't also leave my mind.. but then.. it had no meaning anymore.. sooo yeah.. enough about that..

The other night (gabi nung December 26).. I dreamed something really horrid.. that yeah.. he broked up with me.. the reason really was shocking.. what's more shocking about that.. I finally remembered my dream.. 'cause usually.. everytime I wake up.. I no longer remember my dreams.. prolly it wasn't important.. I guess.. the only dreams that I get to remember.. are the dreams concerning "him".. LOL so yeah.. that dream gave me more reasons to cry from dusk to dawn.. though I'm not pretty sure if that'll happen.. it's just really heart-torturing.. XD sooo yeah.. sweeeeee~ anywoy.. last night.. I got to remember my dream once more.. since yeah.. it was all about him.. XD I'm really glad though that, that dream was GOOD.. at least it was no longer BAD.. TT^TT.. sooo yeah.. sweeeeeeee~

Yesterday.. my 2nd degree cousins from my mother's side (since that their father is my mom's cousin.. xD) came by to visit my sick lolo.. they were all very very pretty~! Especially the twins.. but Kit is way more PRETTY~! Kat was COOL though~! and Danielle has very pretty eyes~! And she's more like the quite type.. ^_____^ and Nicole.. the youngest.. looked masungit.. but they are very friendly.. I wish to know them more~

LOL~.. so yeah.. that was the good part yesterday.. but the SAD part.. was kareshi's news.. that he'll go to America.. or somewhere out there.. on January or was it February of 2008.. very sad.. we only have a year to spend time together.. that news.. really troubled me.. and again.. it gave me more reason to cry from dusk to dawn.. it's like someone already gave us a time limit for this relationship of ours.. sigh.. actually.. that news is somewhat urging me to stop thinking about the suppose to be little problems~! But to me are BIG problems.. and that I should start thinking about spending more time with him.. very sad indeed.. ngaun plang I can't bare it.. pano pa kaya.. pagdumating na yung time na yun.. TT^TT.. very sad indeed..

So yeah.. I also have something to worry about.. my projects and homeworks.. school's up in a week.. sigh.. bitin ang x-mas vacation.. pero.. at least.. I'll get to see him n..

LOVE & JOY

Monday, December 25, 2006

Melancholic Christmas

This would prolly be the most boring Christmas ever.. but yeah.. it does not matter..

The reason why I wanted to post today.. was that.. I really got pissed with what he said.. questioning me with my thoughts about my master.. is the same as questioning my loyalty to him.. it wasn't a good question.. and the things you said with ease what really rang the bell in my mind..

It wasn't funny.. 'cause I don't care what he does.. what he did.. what he'll do.. I don't even care if he'll ruin my life.. my thoughts about him will never ever change.. I really don't know why I got hurt on what you were saying.. I don't even know why it made me cry.. but for sure.. I know that I didn't like it..

He has been a great help to me.. even if he had broken tooo many promises.. and had made toooo many lies.. I accepted it and understood him.. for I know we are quite similar.. The thought of hating him never even crossed my mind.. and now you're asking me stupid questions that I didn't even ask my self..

Most of all.. I don't like people.. saying bad stuffs about my Master.. my cousin.. and about you.. (who ever is this "you".. you know who I'm reffering to) A simple sorry would do it.. but.. I can't simply forget it.. I was badly hurt.. you guys whispering bad gossips about him is fine with me.. since.. it's uncontrollable.. but you.. asking me about sorts of things that I never ever even asked my self.. that really gave a deep cut.. it's unforgettable.. for I never thought wrong about my master.. and then you'll ask me if I really think good about him.. he never said anything wrong about you.. he may have lied to me about stuffs regarding him and you.. but I clearly knew that they were lies.. so what's the point getting pissed at him when you already know the truth? It's better to ignore and forget about it..

I know.. and I understand why you think bad about him.. 'cause that's what he shows.. and.. I've never been close to him.. we are just as close as "classmates".. not "friends".. never "close friends".. sooo.. I know you've been with him on weekends.. spend time with him during free hours.. and talk to him about sorts of stuffs on the phone..

I know what he is.. and I know what's on his mind.. may I be right or wrong.. but I know we are quite similar.. so.. there's this possibilty.. that I am.. right..

To make it simple.. he is not just someone who makes a fool out of Leks.. or make Carla cry.. make Mark mad.. make Jethro piss.. make Kevin spell sorts of word.. or make you guys think bad about him.. for I know.. master's a person who's just like you.. thinks positively.. but gets hurt easily.. I may not know him the way you do.. but I know him.. prolly.. in a more different way..

Cguro.. what hurt most.. was that.. sa lahat pa ng tao.. ikaw pa ang magtatanong sakin nun..

LOVE & JOY

Sunday, December 24, 2006

Merry Christmas~

Sweeeeeeee~ yeah.. I was happy nman kahapon.. XD I was really sleepy when I got home.. nakakaantok dun e.. nakasunod lng ako kila mommy and Ryan.. TT^TT.. sooo yeah.. mga 10 na kami nkauwi.. inaantok n ako.. tpos.. daddy called me and asked me to burn something.. (CD).. I was rolli sleepy downloading those stuffs.. di n nga nila ako makausap.. hahaha~ loli ^________^ but then.. nagring ung fone.. it was me lola.. she was asking daddy to come by at there house because they ran out of oxygen (tank).. soo.. they need a new one.. but they don't know how to fix/put it.. and lolo was having a hard time breathing. So yeah.. daddy went there.. and mommy was left at the shop.. and I was still downloading.. very sleepy.. TT^TT.. pero pagbalik ni daddy.. the fone rang again.. I was expecting it to be auntie Cora.. or nanay again.. but yeah.. to my surprise.. it wus kareshi.. XD I was hapoo? Mommy and daddy was looking at me in a wrong way, kc.. hahaha~ ang hyper qu n nman.. XD He was really fun talking to.. it makes me feel like I wanna hug him that very moment. kya un.. XD I just hugged the fone.. TT^TT

Hahahaha~ so yeah.. pag akyat ko s taas.. my brother told me that I'm being hyper again.. XD lawl.. and that I kept on grinning like an idiot.. XD sweeeeee~ I was just hapoo that time.. hahaha~

So yeah.. XD nothing much to do..~ lawl.. hanggang ngaun.. ayaw parin ako tigilan ni mama.. she asked me bago 2mawag c daddy shams.. kung.. sakit b s ulo c kareshi.. XD sb qu hindi.. sb nia.. "Ganun ba? Ganyan talaga ang mga lalaki.. sa umpisa lang".. lol.. ganun pla tingin nia sa lahat ng lalaki.. xD pero.. yeah.. XD she shouldn't judge people agad.. she's just trying to part us.. demo.. I won't do that.. honto ni~!

Sweeeeeee~ I really really want a Gothic Lolita~ TT^TT.. though.. it wouldn't be for meh, it'll be for my most adorable and pretty cousin~ Meg~! I'm sure she'll look perfect in it.. XD sigh~! Anywoy~! I'll look for it Meg.. XD hahaha~ pero wanqu lang kung kelan.. since I am banned to go outside.. XD sweeeeeeeee~

LOVE & JOY

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Dried Tears

I have finally stopped crying.. *phew* I am sorry kareshi.. honto ni gomenasai..

"I insisted that I come over instead, but you told me that you did not want to see me. You know how much pain I felt when you said those words. It felt like a thousand needles in my heart."

"In the tone of your voice I felt that you did not want to talk anymore. The longer I stayed on the phone hearing you like that felt like I was getting burned alive. Like the pain is getting worse and there is nothing I can do about it."

"Even though all those things she said hurt so much, I know that this is all because she was feeling bad."

Yes.. I am soooooo sorry.. I didn't mean it that way.. though yung iba.. yes.. tama.. pero.. I don't want you to get hurt or feel bad about those stuffs.. if ever possible.. I was hoping that you would ignore it.. but then you didn't..

"I want my old Thea back, the one who is so optimistic, funny, happy, sweet and so full of life."

I think you got it wrong.. I was never optimistic.. not in my life.. I don't expect possible things and I don't think positively.. especially if it concerns me.. though yes.. I am optimistic.. when it concerns you guys.. and the rest was because of you.. I was never happy in my life.. until I found friends to treasure.. and you to be with me.. I was never sweet.. since I am not food.. I was never funny.. I am just me.. I was never full of life.. not until you came. Frankly.. I am not telling you that.. I am no longer the "old Thea" as you said so because of you.. I did not change either.. I was just.. as you said so.. "I know that this is all because she was feeling bad." Yes.. so please don't bug your self with things that.. does not concern you.. if all I think is a lie.. you shouldn't feel bad about it.. since that.. it's my thoughts.. and it's me who is keeping me in a gloomy state.. so.. yeah.. just.. let me be.. mawawala din ito..

Sooo.. yeah.. enough is enough..

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Zettai Kareshi

Yeah.. I just thought of.. uploading this "frame" from my manga Zettai Kareshi, this is when Riiku show the form she filled up for a perfect boyfriend. So yeah.. lemme see if we both have the same thing in mind..

I crossed out what I think does not consider as a trait of a perfect boyfriend.

So yeah.. XD tinatamad akong sabihin why.. XD lawl.. next time nlng.. I feel really sleepy.. my eyes feels heavy.. lawl.. yeah.. I know why naman e.. xD sweeeee~ nap time muna kya meh.. XD

LOVE & JOY

Friday, December 22, 2006

I'm Fine..
I wrote this already in my "BLUE DRAGON notebook".. soo yeah.. I wrote it when I woke up.. I would like to post it lng.. yes.. very.. (editted though)

Morning again, I feel wrong, but then Christmas will be in, in 3 days of long wait.. so yeah, Merry Christmas minna-san~

Anywoy, despite the fact that I feel wrong today, I was kinda happy.. first thing in the morning, his face was the first thing that came in my mind. I was happy, but then I felt sad, remembering what happened yesterday. I was not mad and all.. I was just sad, not because you kept on insisting that I was mad, I always feel this way.. insecure and pessimistic. I never think positively - except for my friends..

I was not sad because you went at Meg's house to give her, her present and not on the fact that "Tumawag daw si Shamir kila Meg pag-uwi niya." (my mom told me that), I was sad on what Ryan said nung nalaman niyang you went and called Meg.. and those words will never ever leave my mind.. "So, sa tingin mo ikaw mahal niyan, e mukhang Meg parin." (that's what my mom told me din.. before we went to Shop Wise..), yes.. hindi ako nakapagsalita.. I was dumbfounded. A moment of silence.. But then, daddy spoke up and said, "Hindi naman ganun yun." Hai~ I would like to thank him for that.. kung di, wanqu na.. XD hahahaha~

I do know that you don't like the fact that I think this way.. that you are "cheating" on me. Well.. I don't really have that "cheating" thing in my mind.. pero.. the fact that you like her is what keeping me in pain. Sabihin mo mang hindi na, wala na 'yon, hindi naman ganun kabalis mawala ang feelings mo sa babaeng hinangad mong maging "girlfriend". Kaya nga sabi ko sayo.. ako yung swerte.. If ever wala na nga.. ganun din.. masakit parin.. for the fact na.. kapalit lng ako dahil alam mong wala kang pag-asa sa kanya.. "Walang kwentang lalaki, kung gusto niya talaga si Meg, sana matuto siyang maghintay".. sino kaya maniniwala sayo na kaya mo maghintay sa kung anu man.. kung si Meg nga hindi mo kayang hintayin.. hay~ Pero yeah.. wala na yan.. scratch 'em out.. it does not matter anymore.. since Nov. 20.. alam ko parin na "Meg", up to now.. so yeah.. wish ko lng nman n.. "don't ever lie again.."

I love you~ very.. that I will accept everything about you.. even if I'll get hurt.. wether my thoughts are right or wrong. Don't be bothered by it.. they're just thoughts that is keeping me in pain. Don't feel wrong about it, for I don't think bad about you.. I just feel/think bad about myself. I'll love you, even if the time would come that you'll love somebody else. I'll accept the truth.. and live with it.

I trust you.. but I don't trust myself.. all I need for now.. is your understanding ego.. and your love.. bare with me..

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What's In
They sure occupies my mind alot O.o

1. Shamir Isaac Fernando Francisco Remigio
As always.. what do you expect? Lawl~ The person I love most.. I value him more than I value my life.. I'll die for him if that's what he likes.. ^_____^

I may be a pain in the head.. but I'm glad na kaya nia akong i-handle.. XD I love him~ everything about him.. XD I love the way he kisses me.. I love the way he hugs me.. I love the way he loves me.. I love the way he squeaks.. I love the way he speaks.. I love the way he eats.. I love the way he sleeps.. I love the way he dress.. I love the way he acts.. I love the way he thinks.. I love the way he reads.. I love the way he laughs.. I love the way he lives.. I love the way he makes me feel secure.. I love the way he shows his care.. I love him and everything about him~ Very much~! No one can ever replace you~

2. Suicide Club
Yes.. a movie I found will browsing Wikipedia.. XD lol~ it was aired last 2002, and yes.. it has an awesome story~ I love it ^________^ I do hope I could watch it.. TT^TT

3. Ai Maeda
Yes~! I love her ^______^ she is very pretty~ and kyaaaa~ she has a poker face in BR II~ Kyaaaaaaaa~ I love her~ She is way better than Aki Maeda.. sweeeeeee~

4. AppleSeed
I just can't take pretty Deunan's face out of my head.. O_O she is very gorgeous~

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HP Shopwise

Sweeeeeeee~ yes.. I am wearing my favorite T-shirt~ it's kinda gray but kinda green.. XD sweeee~ I love it very very much~ hahaha~ lawl.. Anywoy.. yeah.. we went to Shopwise.. it was quite boring though.. all I did was walk and follow my mother.. XD Yeah.. I played a trick wit my brother Ralph~ I told him to close his eyes and that I'll take him to Pluto that he would never have a chance to come back here on earth. Sooo yeah.. niligaw ko cia sa Shopwise (ang liit nman nun e).. pero nakita nmin si Daddy.. pero wanqu b dun.. bigla nlng tumakbo at kya daw niang bumalik kay mommy.. e sus.. 3 stands lng nandun n cla mommy.. pinalayo lng nia sarili nia.. so un.. me and my dad went to mommy.. tpos cia wla prin.. LOL.. tpos nakita qu tumatakbo.. papunta dun sa mga junk foods.. XD naligaw nga~ weeeeeee~ dinaanan n nga kami.. di prin nakita.. XD lawl~ Kaya daw niang bumalik ahh.. XD sweeeeeeeee~

Soo there.. XD lawl~ I just played with my gum and pretended that it was braces.. TT^TT.. I do hope to get one.. pero.. my teeth is fine daw.. no need for it.. TT^TT Sad~ sooo yeah.. when we were about to pay for those goodies.. I saw a pretty-white-tall girl.. and guess who? Sweeeeeeee~ it was MEG~! Hahaha~ what a coincidence.. XD she was with Auntie.. they just thought of taking groceries as well.. since Auntie is kinda pissed with nanay.. very very long story.. XD soo yeah.. I still played with my braces.. ahhh.. I mean gum XD.. and yeah.. so as the story goes.. then yeah.. we're back home.. xD sweeeeeeeeee~ nothing much happened.. I miss him lang.. TT^TT

LOVE & JOY

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Point Of View a.k.a POV

People have their own views on what is "right" and what is "wrong".. they have their own thoughts on what is "good" and "bad".. but sometimes.. they should try to understand why other people try to do the so-called "wrong" and "bad" things.

My onii-sama also have his own POV, and yes.. we are quite alike. Though we are not common on how we see it.. he sees life in a more positive way.. but I see it in a more negative way. But in love, we are quite common, the rest would say that.. it's because we have experienced the same thing.. or have done the same thing.. but.. then.. they should understand.. and try putting themselves on what we are currently experiencing.

We don't really take things for granted.. we do it with purpose.. right? Everything goes with one.. but yeah.. commonly.. people don't know what's the "purpose".. so yeah.. we commonly based it on what the rest thinks is "right".. but then.. you didn't comprehend.. you just based it on what the rest thinks.. you didn't base it on what was the person thinking/feeling. So yeah.. that's why.. we people have this "misunderstanding".. which is way too wrong..

People should try to comprehend.. but there are people who are "strong-minded".. you can never change their POVs.. but the only thing we could ask.. is for them to understand.

People.. sometimes should let us be, so that, we could learn by our mistakes.. feel guilty about it.. but never ever blame anyone. No one ever hoped that thing to happen.. it was because we let it happen. So, if we ever did something, and we didn't like the result/s, we should never ever blame anyone.. the only person we could blame.. is "us", for we take control on our body and mind. Even if you are controlled by someone.. you still can't blame that someone.. for you didn't do anything that would stop that someone controlling you. But then.. even if we have stopped and felt guilty about the things that we did in the past. There are still "humans" who couldn't accept us just because of this bad past. So, commonly.. we look for people who would appreciate us.. yes.. for you people who are still looking/searching.. please don't go suicide.. for that only means that, that person you are looking for, is still not yet here on earth.. but will soon land here.

We may have different POVs.. but what matters most is how we understand and how we accept others.. may they be evil or good.. they could still feel what we feel.. may it be pain.. or joy..

LOVE & JOY

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Between Good and Bad

"Choose your friends wisely", "You have a bad group, try looking for a group that would suit you best".. yes.. I tend to hear that when I was in elementary.. my mom use to worry about my choice of friends.. especially when I reach high school. But now.. all she know is that, Meg is my only friend.. which is.. what I think as well.. XD

But actually.. my choice of friends is based on what I see and what I feel when I'm with them. So yeah.. commonly.. my choice is.. somewhat wrong in the sight of my parents. My choice is not really bad.. as for me.. since I am having fun when I'm with them.. and yes.. even if.. may mga kalokohan sila, I do know that, they are nice and good people who were just mislead by time.. very much likely.

And yes.. it's a lot more nice if you make friends with "mislead people".. since that.. you know their mistakes and what they are from the very start.. but then you'll discover that they aren't so bad, and that is way more nicer. Unlike "good people".. they commonly pretend to be nice.. since yeah.. no one is really nice in this world, they still have that "evilness" in them.. prolly it hasn't been unleashed yet.. but yes.. it's worse to make friends with nice people that would end up "bad".. though not all of them are like this.. but yes.. everyone's POV is based on experience.. and that's what I experienced for all I know.. so this is my output in life or more specifically "friends".

I made friends with people who I know are very friendly and nice from the very beginnning.. but in the end.. we ended up as enemies.. though.. I don't keep grudges to anyone.. so yeah.. that "enemy ewanness" only lasted for a day.. as for me.. but to her.. it was a lifetime ewanness.

Another one was my so called best friend.. "Shari", we were okay at first.. but things started to change.. and I don't know why.. we got separated.. she ended up in a group that I didn't knew she'll end up with.. but yeah.. we're okay now.. but not as close as before.

As for present time, I would say that.. the "good people".. are commonly the one who back stabs a lot (my POV).. and the "mislead people" are the one who usually careless.. (my POV) but then.. they are the one who understands.. unlike the "good people".. they always base it on.. what is "right".. they don't try to comprehend and they never ask the question "why?"..

Sooo.. yeah.. from those, I started to think that Meg is my only best friend.. until now.. and the rest would be "close friends".. but yeah.. I never found this comfortability of expressing who you are with people the rest would least expect.. from my time during my 2nd year in high school. Lian.. and Jake were the persons I talk to with my problems.. (though Jak did back stab me.. I do understand.. dahil.. kahit nman cia.. gnwa nia rin 2..), and from time to time.. Jiz had been a good listener and a good adviser.. on my 3rd year -- current.. Mickey had become someone who is worth talking too.. same with David.. and yes.. among the new students.. Shamir and Carla are the people I would talk too. Frankly, I am not saying that.. they are "mislead people".. but they are the people who "comprehends". Even if they don't, they still try to be of service just to make you feel satisfied.

They/You might find it as an irony, demo it's my POV.. sooo yeah.. leave me alone..

LOVE & JOY

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Lethal Mesmerism

Yes, it was our Christmas party, and yeah.. same as always.. kainan lng ang nangyari.. hahaha~ Ice-cream was the best ^________^ hahaha~ nothing much happened.. except that.. daddy was feeling "wrong".. his tummy was pretty upset.. awww~ I wish I could do something to make him feel better.. TT^TT

Sweeeeeeee~ hahaha.. yeah.. Christmas vacation.. it'll last for 2 weeks or so.. very sad.. I won't be able to see him.. yes.. I won't.. sigh~ anywoy.. master Lei would be at Star City.. at 5:00 pm they'll be off~ That's what best said.. so yeah.. TT^TT.. I wish I could go with them.. but sadly.. I can't.. even if I haven't ask for permission.. I do know that the answer would be "no".. though it's owkay.. as long as I have the computer.. the fone and the tv.. life would be owkay.. ^________^

Hahaha~ sweeeee~ I've read this at friendster.. they're horoscope thingy.. yeah.. it's quite funny.. hahaha~

The Bottom Line
A love-hate relationship with an authority figure is tipping in the love direction.

In Detail
Your love-hate balancing act with an authority figure is most definitely tipping in the love direction right about now. Even with the current hectic pace of your life, you two can find the time you need to clearly communicate what you expect from each other. Rely on your solid communication skills to ease any potentially rough spots that may appear in the near future. You two are developing an excellent relationship.

Sweeeeeee~ yes.. hahaha~ very funny indeed.. well aun.. wla tlga nangyari ngaung araw n 2.. Shams has an upset tummy.. the rest would be at Star City.. magkagalit kami ng kapatid ko.. when I say magkagalit.. magkagalit tlga.. as in magkagalit tlga.. ahmm.. then yeah.. I wouldn't be able to see him for a few weeks.. I'll miss him.. and yeah.. I sure would pray to hug and kiss him once more.. TT^TT.. and yeah.. I'll miss that butterfly feeling.. but thinking of him makes me feel that way as well.. but it's alot more different when I'm with him.. sigh.. very much likely.. TT^TT

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Sweeeeeeeee~ I do hope na.. I would be with you guys, master.. pero.. I know my mom would still say no.. trying it wouldn't be bad.. pero.. yeah.. I don't want to have any conversation with my mom that would bring up Shamir.. so yeah.. please don't get mad.. thanks for remembering me ^_______^ at least I know you could still remember me on such time n LD n nga ngaun.. ^_________^ thank you so much master~

LOVE & JOY

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Sweeeeee~ Kapagod.. TT^TT.. we went to SM Harrison todie.. and it took me long enough to decide what gift I should buy.. it's quite hard to think if someone often disagrees with your choice of present.. sweeeeeeeee~ mama tlga.. hay~ aun.. I don't have enough money.. so yeah.. I only bought 9.. for Shamir, Master, Meg, Mickey, Faus, Jiz, Patti, Carla and Dave.. yes.. the presents were very simple.. but it took a load on my money.. TT^TT.. me 1.5k went to 800.. hayness.. TT^TT Yes.. I want to buy something worth giving.. but yes.. mommy didn't want too.. sila Lei, Mickey at Shams lng nman ang gusto kong bigyan ng ganun e.. TT^TT.. what's wrong with that? Meg's gift is way more expensive.. TT^TT..

Sweeeeeeee~ anyhow.. yeah.. me 800 p nman ako.. I could still do something with it.. yeah.. very.. keep it? Yes.. I have too.. ^________^ Sweee~ So yeah.. I have bought something for Ms. D and Sir Brisky.. very simple.. and very useless.. sana gamitin nila.. yeah~

I saw Jetz at SM and at Bench~ hohohoho~ yes very.. XD I was very very surprised, since I didn't noticed him.. hahaha~ my heart went doki-doki.. very.. ^_________^ sweeeeeeee~ so yeah.. I'm here now.. very very tired.. xD sweeeeeeee~ yet Mickey and Shamir made me all hyper again.. hahaha~ you should read Mickey's post.. it is very funny yet annoying.. I don't wanna have that poison.. and I don't wanna go suicide with Meg.. and for sure.. I don't want Battle Royale to come true.. very scary.. but if it has to be.. it'll be better if it's BR II.. even if it's a game of tag. At least you go and find Shuya and have 30% chance of surviving.. yes.. very ^______^

Sooooooo.. yeah.. I have nothing else to post..

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Top 10 Most Wanted People
More likely.. Top 10 People I Like XD

10. David Emmanuel Lupisan Ko & Alexis Joel Joseph Leuterio
They are one of the persons I could talk to when I have problems.. they are very nice people.. and very funny.. yes.. ^________^

9. Kenneth Tilo
He use to brighten the class up whenever we or specifically me, is sleepy.

8. Don Rosanico Cuyugan
He is very small yet very funny.. hahaha~ lalo na pagSABOG.

7. Lorenz Eugene Cabanos
He makes me all giddy with his cute face and that english of his.

6. Vincent Cabanete
Even though he is a man whore, he still makes me laugh with his funny jokes.

5. Kevin Troy Obida
Yes, a very funny person indeed, he makes me all fine with his stupid acts and clumsy self. Especially that time when I was confronting Hamuat-May, he ran off when he saw that cockroach.. with the funny scream of his.. yes.. the thought is sooooo horrid though.. iono why.. XD

4. Jizelle Orbe
One of my "Comfort Zone", she is very good at giving advice.. and we both love braces.. XD

3. Carla Mae Hutchinson
Yet, another "Comfort Zone", she makes me feel all better with that "Hi Thea!" and "Annushka!" of hers.. it is sooooo high that it stings my ear, but it makes me laugh.. XD hahaha~ laging may kasabay na hug pa un.. a very sweet girl.. ^________^

2. Margarette Grace Omac
My inspiration in art.. she is very very talented~ And we both love Shounen Ai, she is such a sweet lass.. very sensitive and a goody-two-shoes in a more positive way~ In what-so-ever-manner, I love her~ ^________^

1. Vittorio Mikhail Castillo/Castilio Banzon
A person who ALMOST brighten up? everyone's day, most likely.. he is very demented, and has this crazy yet senseful ideas.

Jake Randolph Concepcion
Even though he back stabs me a lot, my POV towards him would never change, since that he has helped me a lot way back then. Plus, even if he made ubermany mistakes, I still do understand him.. for I too make some? (prolly alot)..

Megumi Fiel Ocampo Taguchi
Yes.. my uberlovable but annoying cousin~ She is often my pillar of support~ and yes.. hahaha~ she is my best friend and twin sister.. ^_________^

Lian Dionesse Co
My master~ Even if he had broke ubermany promises, I still respect him above all else, I am not mad for whatever he did, he is still my master and I am hapoo to be one of his aleli.. ^__________^ He has been a lot of assistance to my problems and he has often solved it.. I would obey his orders, but would still have the will to decide whether I should follow it or not.. but he cares for his aleli sooooooo much that he would even SACRIFICE US~ Sweee~ ^__________^

Shamir Isaac Fernando Francisco Remigio
The person who made me very very very happy~ ^__________^ Indeed~ Sa lahat-lahat tlga.. hindi po tlga ako napilitan, and I really have no intentions on leaving you.. I'll be very stupid if I ever do so.. and yes.. I shall forever label myself "stupid" from that day on.. yes.. indeed.

Yes~ Shamir ^________^ I am indeed very lucky! Having the guy of your dreams right next to you is very very awesome~ I was just uberafraid from the very beginning since I already got rejected.. twice won't do me any good, and besides, I knew it was Meg all along.. XD Yeah.. XD sweeeeeee~ Blah~ Those back stabbers will never scare me.. back stab me for all they want, they won't do any harm.. hahaha~ yes very.. XD

Shamir! I love you for all I know~ and I will never ever leave you~ Kill me if I do..

LOVE & JOY

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Oblivion Is Falling Down
Note: Chapter 4: Black Cat.. read.. (tandaan mu nman ung chapter Thea~)

Yes, Hajime No Ippo the Movie, it only lasted an hour, very short, but it made me teary.. yes.. I get easily touch by the story.. POV.. backgrounds of the characters. Hahaha~ yes, but still, Miyata is still as hot as before.. sweeeeeeee~ hohoho~

Yes.. chat.. chat.. chat.. wala akong magawa kundi magchat.. XD made new friends.. ate Dang found me in a fanlisting.. so yeah.. she added me, she is very friendly.. XD So yeah.. she introduced me to some of her friends, Sanzy and Nechi.. there.. they "recruited" me to there forum ewanness.. there I meet the head admin Kythe, she is very nice.. pero.. haha.. superior ang dating.. XD tpos yeah.. right now.. I met Euna.. she is very hyper and weird.. XD hahaha~ pero mabait.. ^_________^ a batch of otakus~ XD

Very.. yes.. sigh.. I would like to watch AppleSeed right now.. I am bored.. very very bored.. yes.. very.. TT^TT Anyhow.. I better talk to them instead.. they seem very happy and hyper.. XD

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The Perfect Male
Yes.. I've asked my fellow otakus what a perfect male is for them.. and sooo.. they gave me there answers..

Euna's Answer: (copy and paste -- yahoo messenger)

is someone who will not take advantage of u
someone who'll respect u
someone who'll carry ur stuffs
someone who'll laugh at u even at ur corniest joke
someone who'll fight for u until the end.......
someone who'll ...who'll bah.. I cant think of anything
lalake = sakit sa ulo

Dang's Answer: (copy and paste -- yahoo messenger)

somone who would always insist of paying the bills when ur dating xD
mysterious
someone who would always fight for your side. as in always..
someone who's not so possesive and obsessed of you O_O;;
sweet.
at mgnda ang eyes. xD
and ciempre, comitted kpg nagmahal..

Sweeeeeeeeee~ very right.. XD hahaha~ skin.. perfect male.. hmmm.. one word.. SHAMIR..

LOVE & JOY

Sweets~

Yes.. very much.. life is full of sweets lately.. XD hahaha~ very.. XD I find him very sweet lately.. very much.. XD I get all funny when I get home.. hahaha~ yes.. very much.. you oftenly find butterflies wondering around your tummy.. very.. XD hahaha~ yes.. I should stop this very much now, or everything would end VERY. Yes~ sweeeeeeeee~

I got a free cotton candy.. XD hahaha~ I have to say yes when he asked me.. ^________^ hohoho~ but it was a cotton candy.. and I want it.. soo yeah.. I don't wanna say no.. XD sweeeee~ thank you sooo much for that Kareshi.. ^_______^

Hahaha~ yes.. Friday.. half day.. XD we went to this stupid thing at PWU at the CB Hall.. very boring indeed. But on top of that, Mrs. Cruz was very kind to us, she was in a good mood, and we thank God for that. She was really friendly.. hahaha~ yes.. very.. XD Shemesh.. Vincent was very annoying.. he kept touching those weali smooth ewaness.. and Mick has to lick it.. very.. horrid? Yes.. very.. O.o.. but yeah.. all in all the cotton candy was the best.. XD very much.. ^__________^ Yes.. I forgot.. Leks.. hahaha~ that was pretty mean, but I know it was an accident.. haha~

Oh yeah.. it was really scary.. yes.. very much Shamir.. really.. XD I was surprisingly scared.. O.o

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Earlier, I got to watch BR II: Requiem, a very interesting movie... very.. XD Ai's story made me teary, but I could bare it.. the blood shed of those poor students and lousy soldiers made me fell.. different? Sweeeeeeeeee~ Yes, very much.. the story and all was pretty amazing, and Ai is very pretty~ I love her! She is way better than Aki! Yes, very! Hahaha~ Anywoy, I still have lotsa movie to watch tomorrow, that Hajime no Ippo Dave lend me.. and the other one.. I forgot the title though.. XD yes.. very.. and Miggs' Shinobi.. XD very much likely~ hahaha... yes.. XD So yeah.. I have nothing to do.. sweeeee~

LOVE & JOY

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Sweeeeeeeeeee~

Yey~ Computer <3.. after 4 days of computer ban.. I have finally survived.. TT^TT Shemeh.. Anyhow.. nothing much happened in the past few days.. the family day was superb (yet boring).. and the battle of the bands thingy that occured nung Mondie.. was owkay.. Chugaku Sei got 3rd place since that some of the bands got disqualified.. prolly that was the only reason why we got 3rd place. LOL XD

Owkay.. much has been said.. hahaha.. XD anyhow.. nung Tuesdie.. I thought it wus the end of teh world.. I really thought he was mad.. I was feeling cold when I told it to Meg.. it was really spooky.. plus.. I can't bare the thought that he is mad at me.. but happily.. he is not.. if he is.. I'll prolly cry for joy.. haha.. -____-

Sweeeeeee~ I am currently collecting DVDs.. well.. not rolli.. Mick would let me borrow his Bleach, Dave would let me borrow his Hajime no Ippo thing.. Miggs have lend us her Shinobi, BR II and FMA.. LOL.. and yes~ many many.. XD yey! At least I have something to watch on our Christmas Vacation.. hehehe.. XD

Anywoy.. gladly life has been a bliss.. XD Hahahaha~ Does not matter if Mark and the others have lotsa things to say 'bout meh.. as long as he is around, there thoughts wouldn't matter.. yes~ very~ I am hapoo ^___________^ Weeeeeeee~

Hahaha.. anywoy.. yes.. since that I have nothing else to say.. and someone has been complaining lately.. that he is just a DUDE.. but that was my first impression on a guy na mukhang nakaDRUGS.. LOL.. it was on the month of JUNE.. don't expect anything yet.. XD

Sooo.. yeah.. 3rd Year Aquila
Now on my current outlook.. >__________>

Clinton Angga a.k.a Buhangin (many more) - for me is mayabang

Vittorio Mikhail Castillo/Castilio (either way..) Banzon a.k.a Rebounder/Baboy (master calls him that way.. so yeah.. XD) - a demented but nice onisama

Mark Kevin Basilio a.k.a Balisong (many more) - his Mark.. yes.. very..

Vincent Cabanete a.k.a Flea/Polo (many many many more) - man whore yet friendly and nice

Lorenz Eugene Cabanos a.k.a Baby Bro/Sabog - nice and funny and very ADORABLE

Lian Dionesse Co a.k.a Snail (many more) - my master.. I respect him a whole lot, he is very nice and evil at the same time.. XD <3 Mistress Carlei

Jake Randolph Concepcion a.k.a Unggoy (many more) - nice and backstabs me a lot

Don Rosanico Cuyugan a.k.a Dwarf/Nuno (many more) - kadalasang sabog.. yet he is very nice and friendly.. yes.. hahaha~

David Emmanuel Lupisan Ko a.k.a Sweet and Sour Pork (many more) - a Chinese Man, nice, and loves BUTT

Kevin Noel Lampano a.k.a Silver/Lolo/Cotton Candy (many more) - very annoying.. yes.. very..

Jethro Laurente a.k.a Sus (many more) - a nice person.. pero puro kalokohan

Alexis Joel Joseph Leuterio a.k.a Chu (many many more) - a very obedient person.. very..

Kevin Troy Obida a.k.a Puppy/Epi/Bokit/Ipis/Pasas (and many many many more) - a very nice person.. and funny too.. XD LOL

Shamir Isaac Fernando Francisco Remigio a.k.a Tae/Shabug - a very nice person.. reliable and has very very long patience.. I Love Him.. <3

Ralph Angelo Alfaro Rivo a.ka. Ilong/Lolo/Tanda (and many more) - a very annoying person

Kenneth Tilo a.k.a P***/Kiki (many many more) - a nice and funny person.. XD

Carla Mae Hutchinson a.k.a Potato/Emo/Mistress Carlei - an EMO GOTHIC PUNK who likes to cut her wrist.. very scary.. she's nice and fun to be with.. very giddy.. XD

Patricia Angeli Hofer Marcaida a.k.a Kuwago - a person who also likes to cut her wrist..

Megumi Fiel Ocampo Taguchi a.k.a Cat - a very giddy person.. never cuts her wrist.. *phew* and very annoying.. she's my most precious cousin.. XD

Yes.. very.. I have nothing more to say.. hahaha~ hopefully you would stop complaining.. yes.. but knowing you, you would annoy me and complain even more.. hahaha~ yes.. very.. XD Anywoy.. yes.. I have nothing else to type here.. and your testi.. would be there if ever my brain would function.. hahaha~ I found you very sweet this die.. XD sweeee~ I am soooooo lucky.. very.. XD Arigatou <3

LOVE & JOY

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Wakata Yo Wakata

Sushi~ todie was our "Family Day".. and it was as boring as hell.. Shams was right.. if the word family is involve, boring would always be in it. Sheeshh.. anyhow.. the Battle of the Bands thingy was there and we hafta dance.. I forgot teh steps so yeah.. it was horrid.. lawl. I borrowed Rafael's shoe for the presentation.. XD since Carla was complaining about the panda.. it's not really meant for hammering.. soo.. yeah.. she's right.. XD Tom was pretty mean, he didn't let me borrow his shoe.. so yeah.. Rafael was nice.. XD hahaha~ So there.. we won 1st place.. quite expected at first but not really.. since yoah.. the "dancers" (with ""), did not really dance very well.. XD we weren't really prepared.. XD but happily.. we got 91%, since we extended some time, we got a minus 5, so it was suppose to be 96%.. lawl. Teacher Aida was really expecting that they'll get first prize.. since they have this dance thingy, but it was really meant to be a "Battle of the Bands".. so us dancing there didn't really mean anything.. XD lawl. Mark was the best drummer.. Mickey was the best guitarist.. so yeah.. no one can beat that.. XD besides.. from the rest.. I think that we were the liveliest.. hahaha~ it was prolly because of the drum. lawl.

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44 Thing A Girl Would Die For?
I don't really agree on 'em all.. they're not all right..

1. Touch her waist.
2. Talk to her.
3. Share secrets.
4. Give her your jacket.
5. Kiss her slowly.
6. Hug her.
7. Hold her.
8. Laugh with her.
9. Invite her places.
10. Let her be with you when you're
with your
friends.
11. Smile with her.
12. Take pictures with her.
13. Pull her onto your lap.
14. When she says she loves you more,
deny it.
Fight back, tell her you love her more.
15. When her friends say they love her
more than
you, deny it. Fight back and hug her
tight so she
can't get to her friends. It makes her
feel
loved.
16. Always hug her and say you love her
when
you see her.
17. Kiss her unexpectedly.
18. Hug her from behind around her
waist.
19. Tell her she is beautiful, not
sexy.
20. Tell her the way you feel about
her.
21. Kiss her on the lips.
22. Don't ask her to buy you stuff. You
buy her
stuff.
23. Tell her what feels good.
24. Make her feel loved.
25. Buy her stuff. Even small things
count.
26. Don't LIE to her.
27. DON'T CHEAT ON
HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
28. Take her anywhere she wants.
29. Message her in the morning and tell
her to
have a good day at school/work and how
much
you miss her.
30. Be there for her when ever she
needs you,
and even though she doesn't need you be
there
so she'll know that she can always
count on you.
31. Hold her close when she's cold so
she can
hold you too.
32. When you are alone, hold her close
and kiss
her.
33. Kiss her on the tip of her nose, it
will
give her
the hint that you want to kiss her.
34. While at the movies, put your arm
around her.
She will then automatically put her
head on your
shoulder. Then lean in and tilt her
chin up and
kiss
her lightly.
35. When she complains that her
neck/shoulder
hurts, massage it for her.
36. When people diss her, stand up for
her.
37. Look deep into her eyes and tell
her you love
her.
38. Lay down under the stars and put
her head on
your chest so she can listen to the
steady beat
of
your heart. Link your fingers together
while you
whisper to her as she rests her eyes
and listens
to you.
39. When walking next to each other,
grab her
hand.
40. When you hug her, hold her in your
arms as
long as possible.
41. Call her at night to wish her sweet
dreams.
42. Comfort her when she cries and wipe
away
her tears.
43. Take her for long walks at night.
44. Always remind her how much you love
her.

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True True
Ubertrue.. sana may ganyan na tao.. TT^T

You know what you're doing in a certain difficult situation, but you aren't the one in charge today. This could cause some conflict -- but ego clashes don't always have to be ugly. If you see that a rival is about to make a misstep, don't interfere. Try not to force your opinions on people who are doing what they think is best -- give them the opportunity to learn from their mistakes. Mind your own business today. Don't try to grab the steering wheel, but do fasten your seatbelt.

If you see someone about to make a mistake, let it happen. He or she will learn.

LOVE & JOY

Friday, December 08, 2006

Sabog

Shessh.. antok na ako.. -__________- hay... siguro tama nga yung sinabi ni master.. sandali lang ung inis na 'to.. kahapon halos mamatay na ako sa kakaiyak, sa kakaselos at sa inis nung sinabi niya talaga un.. potah.. prang ginagamit lng nia ako.. pero.. kanina.. hahaha~ nawala nga.. -____________- wanko.. masyado lang ata akong nagiisip.. muka na akong tanga sa kakamukmok.. sabi nia nung gabi nung wednesday.. gagawa lng daw cia ng portfolio.. halos isa o dalawang oras un bago cia tumawag ule.. kaso 2log na ako.. tpos.. nung kinabukasan.. wla pla ciang nagawa.. ano b tlga? gumawa cia o may ginawa ciang iba? sus.. malay ko na.. -_______- anyway.. di naman na yun importante.. napapaicip lng.. tpos 2 nman c master.. kung anu-ano n ung ginagatong.. argh. dagdag lng s inis.. pero at least.. may nakakausap ako.. hay..

-__________- kanina.. pumunta cia d2.. mga 1:30 pm na ata un e.. o quarter to 2:00.. tpos umalis cia ule ng mga 3:00.. bumalik makalipas ng 25 o 30 minutes.. nagstay hanggang 9:43 o 9:45 pm.. hahaha.. masaya ako.. sa totoo lng.. (inaantok nga lng..) hay.. mahal na mahal ko cia.. wanko lng kung mahal nia din ako.. pero.. sb nga ni Doll.. dapat alam ko un.. nararamdaman ko nman na mahal nia ako e.. hay.. pero.. ou.. sb nga ni master.. kung sumasayad s isip ko ung tanong na "sino kaya mas mahal nia.. ako o si Kat?".. napaicip ako.. kc.. lagi ko ngang natatanong un sa sarili ko.. argh.. at ung sagot na laging lumalabas "Si Kat".. weeeeeee~ alam ko naman na patay na patay cia dun e.. hahaha.. nu nga naman laban ko sa ex na natuk away n? -______- malay na.. basta.. tigil na muna ako sa kakaisip.. masyado lng ata akong inaantok.. hay..

LOVE & JOY

Thursday, December 07, 2006

K.I.S.S

Hahaha~ I kept on guessing on what would that K.I.S.S mean, since Jethro have been protesting it to Teacher Gretchen. Finally, she told us, it was an abbv for "Keep It Short Stupid". LOL, the word stupid makes it sound funny.. hahaha~ XD

Anyway, the past few days have been, rather.. blissful. LOL >////>, I've been enjoying life this much na. Thanks to him..^___________^ Hahaha~

Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~ I feel stupid.. DX I feel stupid and I don't know why.. hahaha~ Prolly it's because I've been so happy that I would like to leave this world already *knock on wood*, but yeah, I'd rather live and spend more time with him, than to die early. Sweee~ I'm soooo lucky~ ^____________^ Having the guy you like as your kareshi is the best thing evah.. XD Hohohoho~

Hahaha~ NVM, anyways, on Saturdie, it'll be our "Family Day", and there would be this Battle of the Band thingy, we'll be participating in it, and yeah.. I'm not really looking forward to it, but, yeah.. XD I should since that, it'll be the only thing I should participate to so that I don't have to make the project in Filipino. I won't do much though.. ^__________^ Hahaha~ Ohyiah.. I almost died laughing at school, Jake and Mickey are sooo like gays.. XD LOL.. hard gay~ Noodle and soup~ Weeeeeeeeeee! I'm insane.. >////////>

Hahaha~ sweet soft lips.. XD weeeeee~ nagkasingaw 2loy aqu.. TT^TT.. hohoho~ hay.. sana may practice bukas.. I don't wanna stay here at home.. it's uberboring.. TT^TT Annoying parents.. stupid brothers.. a boring house.. it's a lot more fun when I'm with my classmates and friends.. sheesh..

LOVE & JOY

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Weeeeeeeeee~

Hahaha~ I am soooo hapoo today! ^__________^ Weeeeeeee!!! Never felt better.. >////> Butterflies~ weeeeeeeee! Hahaha.. XD Nababaliw na ako.. argh. Nothing much happened, it was a pretty normal day.. hohoho~ Carlei was just trying to jump off the stairs yesterday, because of the pain she felt, but I could say that Lei is a very lucky guy to have a girl like her. Even though Lei treats her as an object (as Carlei said), she still love him the way she has always been. I am glad that she is still standing strong, but she's been crying too much, though we all know that she could still go on. Stay strong DOLL.. he won't leave you the way those bastards did.. you're a simple and special girl that I know Lei can trust, but he can't just disregard what's coming up to that stiff mind of his. Bare with it.. but, you should know what's best for you. YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~ nothing much to say today.. I'm just freakin' sleepy.. I don't know why though.. grrr..

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On that Baguio trip nga pala.. everyone said that his been a good boy.. hahaha~ good then.. XD

LOVE & JOY

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Argh~

Nothing much to do.. uberboring.. uberboring.. yes.. uberboring.. this is there last night in Baguio.. and tomorrow.. it's there free time.. potang free time. It would have been better if next thing in the morning they'll go home already. Shit! What's with this free time.. go home already will yeah? Lei and I are dying here.. while Meg does not care at all.. what a gal.. xD Hahaha~ but, yeah.. why would she care? Hohoho~

Anyways.. at first.. I thought it would take ages before Sunday would come.. but look, it's already Saturday, and all I have to do is wait for 9:00 pm, Sunday.. hahaha~ Yes.. I forgot to count the days and hours.. it was running fast.. I never noticed. Hahaha..

Yeah.. waiting only made me bored.. I never got to talk to him.. nor do I have anything to do.. (right.. daming homework, Thea..) LOL.. all I did was.. do my uber report in computer and watched Battle Royale with Meg. It was an awesome movie.. shocking but funny.. XD hahaha~ it was gross at the beginning, but I got used to it. Right.. and now.. I can't wait for Monday.. I just hope (but I don't have that feeling anymore), that he is not flirting with anyone.. or, yes.. I will freakin' bite him at the arm when he gets back.. I better ask my "bantays" and see what that guy did.. grrr! But, yes.. I don't have that feeling that he's doing something and.. I only had that FEELING yesterday.. since yeah.. master was adding the tension. He was telling me stuffs that would have been possible.. mei god.. I was brain washed. LOL But I'm owkay now.. I guess.. I miss him lng.. that's all..

*Can't Wait For Monday*

LOVE & JOY

Friday, December 01, 2006

Never knew..

Hahaha~ never knew na mei sinasabi ka pla sa likod qu.. ouchie~ Before.. I always trusted you.. with all the secrets, tears, fears and POV I shared with the both of you.. then in the end.. you hated me for that pla.. Sigh.. Demo.. it's owkay, I understand.. I find myself irritating as well, and.. right now.. it does not matter, kung anu man ung mga sinabi mu noon.. at ngaun, basta masaya ako, it's fine with me. I would not let me self get gloomy with stuffs I long to forget. But, thanks for listening, nung mga panahon na.. hindi p ganito ang tingin mu skn.

Anyways, kalimutan n ntin un.. napapaiyak lng aqu e.. XD Yeah.. yesterday, I was feeling down (hanggang ngaun).. this is the 2nd day they're not here.. and it's taking ages.. miss na namin kau ni Lei.. TT^TT I did nothing.. except to think and worry a lot. I watched Spirited Away.. a movie he lend me, it was a nice one, kept me occupied for a while. Pero, pagkatapos nun.. my mind was full of horrid thoughts, hahaha~ I was glad master Lei went online, I finally got to talk to someone. We didn't talk much.. just doodled in yahoo.. he even drew this pic, very awesome ne?

Anyhow.. yeah.. there.. pagkatapos nian.. I went offline.. mommy told me to stop na.. I stayed a little longer, since yeah, I was waiting for his call.. it took awhile.. so yeah.. I thought of taking a bath muna.. while in the bathroom.. he called.. I know it was him.. no one called that late, and yeah.. when I got out of that stupid bathroom, he called again. I got to talk to him, but I think he's in no mood for any conversation.. feeling ko nabobored cia skn.. haaayyyyyyyyyy.. Then yun.. lowbat na daw.. so he put the phone down na.. pero.. after 30 minutes, tumawag cia ule.. mga 12:20 o 12:25 am un.. he said.. he could not sleep daw.. right.. then.. after a 2 or 1 minute talk.. naputol n.. I guess lowbat n cia.. or.. wla ng lowd.. argh.

Hay.. anyway.. pagkagicing qu kanina.. I was all teary.. since.. I had a nightmare (for meh it was a nightmare already).. in my dream.. I saw him with a cellphone.. kinuha qu daw ung cell nia.. binasa ung mga msgs. I saw there a girl's name, I think it started with the letter C or S.. nakalimutan qu n e.. tapos un.. he told me, it was someone he met in that YMCA trip. And yeah.. when I read the other msgs, they were full of sweet words.. hahaha~ sna hindi nman un 22o.. My mom used to say that.. every dream means the opposite in reality.. hopefully~ Shit! Baka mapatay qu cia pagdating nia ule d2.. kung 22o man un.. potah.. I feel betrayed 2loy.. pero.. he did say na.. he won't do such thing.. I hope soooo.. tangna! Di tuloy aqu mapanatag.. argh.. we'll see.. pagbalik nia.. Lei told me nman n.. he won't do such.. soooooooo yeah.. I'll believe.. sigh.

*I intend to keep that promise.. and no longer break it..

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He never got to call na.. wla na lowd.. anu kya nangyari..? Did he..-?
Potah.. tama na kakaisip.. ;_______;

LOVE & JOY