Friday, November 03, 2006
EGO
What makes it feel wrong.. is that I started to fall inlove, with something that can only be seen, but can never be with. I started to act fooly, and thought only for myself; ego. But who can ever undo this feeling of dejection? That when everything feels right.. you'll find out in the end, that it was all just a dream. That a person who would understand and tell who you are would come. That, a perfect life can be felt.. why would it all be gone.. when you start to open these eyes? That all you'll see.. is a turtle-clock pinned down on the wall.. and that everything.. is reality?
Why? Why do I have to hide my otakuness in front of people whom I know I could influence? Why do I act selfishly when I have fallen again? Why? Why did I even fell in love? Why is this feeling of joy can only be found in an object that I can never be with all my life? Why can it only remain in my memories? That I even have to look for it, so that this feeling of emptiness would be filled up again.
Why? Why were you my first love? That, I was so engrossed to you, that I forgot this world. The world wherein I am currently standing on.. the world where I move and live on.. the world where I found you.. why? Why can't I be where you are?
Loving you was the best thing I could yearn for.. I love you with my own free will, and yet.. you would love me back. Everyone who falls under your spell will never acquire unrequited love.
You never asked for us, but you would always return our cries, you'll be there to leave a smile on our face.. and you'll always make us cry in the end of every episode, but.. in every end there is always a new start, and that start, is where we discover a new one. Why is life, full of sorrow that is.. natural? why can't there be a sorrow that would touch the heart of the world? Why can't anime be real?
Anime, you've been my comfort on times when it felt like the world started to hate me.. but then, you're characters, contents, and lessons.. taught me, how to live a blissful life, even if I am already hanging in the end of a cliff, you gave me strength, and gave me enough courage to push myself to up.
I know, that when people would came and ask for your help, you will never reject.. for I know.. you were not given, that kind of ability. I am insane.. for I have fallen inlove, to such object.. that I can only see.. but cannot be with. But, I also know, that.. I wouldn't find, anything.. that can love me back, as anime did..
RULES
PLEASE READ THESE TERMS:
[#o1] Welcome to my blog
[#o2] Do not rip anything off
[#o3] Do not steal anything from here
[#04] Ask permission if you're going to take anything
[#o5] What's here remains here
[#o6] Tag before you leave
[#o7] No vulgarities
[#o8] Leave if you're unhappy
ORE WA ONNA JANAI
Watashi wa Althea desu. A normal otaku.
I'm happy to have friends which will last forever, and I'm hoping for a longer relationship with my Anata.
Hope this upcoming new life will be a lot more wonderful than my past few years. Hoorah for college!
Let's create more memories together. Zutto zutto.
P.S WATASHI WA ONNA DESU! ^^
I CRAVE FOR
i'll write it down in the death note;
Digital Camera
Death Note Live Action
Summer Tour 2007 Final Time: Kotoba no Chikara DVD
To set foot in Japan with my TOMODACHI
Death Note
Hapoo Memories
Finish College
NIPPON ARTIST
TOMODACHI
Anno Meg
Little Meggy
XD Ryan
Arekixu Leks
Jethro
Jenny-chan
Miggs
Jizelle
Queens
Suicidal Imo
Kimmeh
EXITS
KILL THE SILENCE
KINOU
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
MUSIC IN MY HEART
CREDITS
Layout by xcake @ blogskins
Layout features ARASHI from Johnny's Entertainment, Japan's Biggest Idol Agency.
PS7.0 used and coded on Notepad. No brushes.
